In A Better You

How to Feel Better About Yourself

How to Feel Better About Yourself

Two hazards in American culture exist that on the surface appear as admirable traits, but in reality if taken too far can destroy even the most healthiest relationships, and it’s perfectionism and being overly independent. If these two traits become abundant in a person though others will admire them or what they do, it has a high likely hood of putting important relationships in danger.

Self Esteem

A healthy self-esteem does not come just from our inner talk. Self-esteem level depends on life circumstances, family conditions, institutions and affiliations. How a person or child processes an indiscretion, an insult, an incident or bullying affects self-esteem. It oscillates throughout our lives depending on circumstances and who we have in our lives to give us positive feedback. How to feel better about yourself happens differently for each person.

Constant barrages of competition in American society making winners and losers instead of participants often results in lessening creativity, creating depressive and oppressive environments, and disregards most people’s natural gifts. Fortunately the United States has civil laws against harassment to prevent institutions, schools, and churches from creating over competitive environments of perfectionism. When it does seep in, particularly during a vulnerable time counselors, therapists, and many nonprofit organizations have web sites about feeling better about yourself.


A nurturing environment of positive affirmation offers the best solutions for how to feel better about yourself. Family who offers options on how to better yourself in healthy ways comes as the best defense against worldly negativity. Confirming the gifts they see in you and allowing for mistakes along with protecting you from bullies, overt negativity, and too much competition develops healthy levels of self esteem. So when an incident does happen or a person goes through a divorce, death of a loved one or bullying episode they have a place of positivity to go to. Work to make positive home environments.

Recognizing Negative Environments

Negative environments have signs.

  1. Children look nervous, have tummy aches and are reluctant to speak.
  2. People disappear without explanation of what happened.
  3. A high turnover rate at a work place indicates a problem.
  4. People do not attach to each other and greet each other coldly. There may be a few warm positive individuals but they have been overly burdened by others for the positive cheer needed to make a place function.
  5. These places use the guise of rules, tradition, a fear or even religion to create the negative environment. They may even be overtly nice at first but something about it will bother you. They will insist on “the rules” over relationship.

Check by making a statement that is not the norm and look for the reaction. If an honest conversation, lively debate with respect for your opinion ensue or sincere questions on why you think that or do that happen then it is most likely safe. Positive environments make modifications, respect your opinion, allow discussion and thrive on diversity to the point they welcome such.

How Feeling Better About Myself Contributes to Good Health

Having a constant stream of negative thoughts or having to deal with a negative environment creates stress. Chronic stress changes the biochemistry of the body where energy becomes drained from necessary body functions. Over time it manifests into physical, emotional, and sometimes mental conditions. Depression comes as a process where the biochemistry of the brain changes so that it literally functions differently and negative thoughts become the norm. Negativity lowers the body immune system and makes it less likely to handle a disease. The likelihood of having a heart attack increases as well. For the public health and personal health such negativity has to become dealt with as well as perfectionism and over reliance on self.

Too Much Independence

Being self-reliant and independent is an American icon. The real truth is no one is a self-made person. People develop in a community. To become an accomplished young adult at least 50 to 60 school teachers contributed to the skill level. Numerous mentors in the family, church or activities participated in contributed as well. Their support and care help keep children and young adults positive.Those daily or weekly nudges help keep many people on track to a normal healthy life. If life has not been kind during childhood or later then friendships become the way to deal with it.

Friendships in Later Years

As aging occurs friendships become more important since loved ones passing on, disease or just dealing with old age serves as a motivator for developing relationships to help navigate all that. Part of how to feel better about yourself comes as your ability to form new relationships as your life changes. Life becomes easy to deal with when a few people know what you have been through or someone likes you no matter what you do and even laughs about your foibles or naughtiness.


If you see someone sitting alone at least go say hello. Often the person is dealing with something or someone and does not wish to hurt by saying something out of their pain or they think they are not acceptable. Most people do not wish to burden others with a sad tale or complaint but often talking to someone is what is needed. Sometimes a person has a personal need either directed by a doctor and isolate to take care of it.

Schools are required to allow students to modify tasks by doodling, whispering out loud, telling someone, asking for the assignment to become phased or allowed to have more time. Unfortunately the adult world is not as forgiving despite having American Disability Association laws. Adults often try to force other adults into mannerisms and ways that are unhealthy for them. With an aging population and continued integration of special needs adults’ modification, process and tolerance will become the norm. How to feel better about yourself means be you, modify for your needs, and make a relationship as often as you can.

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