Dealing with the hassle of a bully in any form can often feel overwhelming and in same cases, even unbearable. Understanding how to go about coping with bullying is a way to regain strength and control over your own life without lashing out or using bully behavior yourself. Learning why others bully can also help you to gain more perspective on others to keep you from exhibiting similar behavior in the future. Learn How to Cope With Bullying!
What is Bullying?
Bullying is any type of harassment that is directed towards one individual. Bullying can consist of verbal abuse, physical attacks, and even sexual abuse in some cases. Most bullying is done by one individual or groups against a single individual who may appear weak or unable to defend themselves. Bullying today also includes cyber-bullying, or bullying with the use of text messages, phone calls, and even with social networking communities such as Facebook and Twitter. Bullying is no longer an issue that is simply settled on the playground between children, but instead, it is now more emotionally damaging with the use of social media and the Internet. Sharing photos, making jokes, and sending hurtful texts are all forms of cyber-bullying when they are sent with a cruel nature.
Reasons for Bullying
There are many reasons individuals choose to bully; most of them stemming from internal struggles and their own weaknesses and vulnerabilities. Bullies often pick on other individuals to help with boosting their self-esteem or when they are jealous of another. Another common reason for bullying is that individuals who have been bullied in the past often repeat behavior in their own lives in the future. People who get thrills out of bullying others are often attempting to escape their own problems or to gain control in the one situation they feel they have control over in their lives. Understanding why others bully is a way for you to gain insight into why individuals may be targeting you directly to help with masking their own pain, jealousy, or inability to cope with emotions they feel without harassing others.
The more you understand about bullies, the easier it is to keep them at a distance from you to avoid the confrontations altogether. The less you give in to bullying behavior even with reactions, the less likely you are to become a target or a victim of bullying yourself.
Telling someone you are being bullied is the first step to coping with bullying altogether. Talk with a close family member, friend or another individual you can trust about the bullying you have been experiencing. The only way to seek out the necessary help and guidance you need is to admit you are being bullied or harassed by another individual. If you are within a school, it is also important to report the bullying and harassment directly to the principal or the administrator of the school itself. If you are unable to talk to a family member or a friend regarding any bullying you have been experiencing, seek help from a local or a school counselor that assists with bullying and harassment cases.
Build a Support Group
Building a support group is a way to find emotional and mental strength regardless of what bullying has put you through in the past. Having a solid support group of family members and friends who love and care about you can help with overcoming any depression and anxiety you may be feeling from bullying experiences in the past.
Walk Away and Avoid Giving in to the Situation
Whenever you are near a bully or being harassed by another individual, it is important to avoid giving in to the situation by walking away and simply ignoring the issues. When you begin lashing out or using similar behavior as the bully, this will likely only fuel them to continue bullying and harassing you in the future. The less you show that you care about the bullying and that it is affecting you personally, the less likely the bully is to continue with bullying you altogether.
Any time there is a potential threat of physical violence it is imperative to walk away or to find a location where you are safe and surrounded by others. Whenever you have been given physical threats of violence it is important to report each incident individually so it is on record with official police and school administrators. The more reports you file, the less likely the bully is to continue harassing you. If the harassment does not stop with the bully you are dealing with and confronting, it may be time to consider getting a restraining order to help with making your statement more official regardless of your age and where your see the bully in your life each day.
Report Bullying Behavior
Report bullying behavior whether it is occurring outside of school or within the school you attend itself. Reporting bullying behavior is the only way to ensure an administrator or a police officer can help to assist you through getting the bullying to stop entirely. When you are being harassed outside of school and you do not feel protected, reporting the incidents to your local police department may be necessary to get parental and authority figures involved.
Although you may feel pressure not to report the bully who is bothering you due to additional threats, it is necessary to report any inappropriate behavior that is considered bullying at any age and regardless of whether you are within a school building or even in your own workplace. Reporting bullying behavior can often have serious consequences on the offender; which may prompt them to stop the harassment of you altogether.
Develop Positive Relationships in Your Life
Developing positive relationships in life and having various hobbies, interests, and future goals for yourself is one of the best ways to cope with bullying, regardless of how many years you have struggled with being bullied or picked on yourself. Understanding how to cope with bullying may take years to overcome, especially if you have been picked on for your entire life throughout school and even outside of learning institutions.
Having a support group with people you love and enjoy spending time with is a way to take your mind off of bullying altogether, regardless of how you have been personally affected. The more support you have in your life, the easier it becomes to brush off annoyances of others who are simply trying to get a rise out of you by intentionally upsetting and insulting you.
Avoid Putting the Blame on Yourself
Whether you have just recently started to get bullied or if you have been bullied for as long as you can remember throughout school, it is essential to avoid putting the blame of the bullying on yourself. Putting the blame on yourself can cause additional stress, anxiety, and depression triggers. Understand that you are not the reason you are being bullied and that the bully themselves is the cause of any strain you are feeling in the situation.
Spend time rediscovering yourself and everything you love about yourself to keep the blaming at bay. The more you love about yourself, your friends, family and hobbies, the less time you will have to even spend thinking about bullying or other negative news and details in your life. Spending less time thinking of bullying will ultimately allow you to care less about the situation in its entirely, keeping the bully from being interested in picking on you or choosing you as a target.
Embrace yourself and be proud of who you are to keep bullies at bay. The more you love yourself and appreciate the qualities you have, the less likely you are to be viewed as a target for bullying. It is important to appreciate yourself and feel confident in who you are to eliminate any stress associated with bullies and other individuals who simply enjoy being mean to one another.
If you have severe anxiety and depression that has stemmed from your past encounters with bullies, it is important to consider the option of working together with a professional counselor or therapist. Visiting counseling sessions and talking openly with a therapist is a way for you to find relief from the feels you have regarding bullying and how it has impacted your life negatively and how it has affected you emotionally. Counseling and therapy is possible in individual sessions as well as with group therapy options that allow others who have been bullied to join into the sessions themselves.
Having an understanding of bullying and the different types of bullying that are most common today is a way to gain insight into the world of bullying and how to go about protecting yourself if you have been a victim. Handling bullying in school, the workplace, or even in public can be done with the right attitude and frame of mind, regardless of who the bully may be to you.