Being a parent can sometimes be a very challenging job despite its ability to be simultaneously rewarding. It’s the type of job that doesn’t allow any breaks, as parenting must be done 24/7. If you are a parent, then you are undoubtedly aware of just how challenging raising a child can be. If you are concerned that you may be raising a condescending child, then here are some tips for possibly reversing this behavior so your child can become well-rounded instead:
First of all, you may need to define condescending. The condescend definition is to exhibit a feeling of superiority and patronize others. In other words, to condescend someone is to treat others as if they are less then you are, as if you’ve put yourself on a high pedestal that is above everyone else. While it isn’t a crime to behave in a condescending manner, it certainly isn’t a quality that parents want their children to have.
How do you handle condescending behavior?
If you have witnessed your child condescending others, then you should definitely talk to him or her. Of course merely talking will not change the behavior, as you will have to work much harder at helping your child to change. In fact, it will likely take a great deal of work on both your parts in order to help your child to change. That means that you must help your child to admit that he or she is condescending and that he or she doesn’t want to be that way. Then and only then can you help your child to become a better person.
Consequences of raising a condescending child
There are many consequences of having a condescending child. Your child is more likely to bully other children, since he or she feels others are beneath him or her. Increasing amounts of schools are taking a tougher stand on bullying, as bullying has led to violence and even suicide in so many cases.
Helping your child
There are many ways that you as a parent can help your child to stop treating others in a condescending manner. First of all, you might want to consider counseling. Both individual and family therapy can be great ways to help your child. An experienced licensed therapist can help your child get to the root cause of why he or she believes he or she is superior to others. It might be uncovered that your child actually doesn’t feel that way but is only behaving in a condescending manner as a coping mechanism. Your son or daughter could actually be feeling the total opposite of superior, as he or she could actually be suffering from low self-esteem.
Suggesting that your child perform volunteer work providing assistance to homeless or mentally ill individuals can work wonders. It can help your child to develop in a number of ways and gain a sense of respect, humility and appreciation that might not ever be possible until years later otherwise. He or she will likely object to working with homeless individuals at first, but after a while he or she may begin to actually enjoy providing assistance to those who are less fortunate.
Behaving in a condescending manner is probably only temporary, especially if you and the child’s other parent treat others in a friendly and equal manner. Volunteering to help those who are less fortunate might be just what he or she needs to change and become the person he or she is meant to become.
You can help you child in other ways, as well. Get your child involved in extracurricular activities. You might want to suggest a children’s yoga class. Yoga can help your child tremendously. Not only can yoga teach your son or daughter breathing techniques that can help with relaxation, but it can improve self-confidence and self-esteem, and a great deal more. If you can’t find a children’s yoga class in your area, then you can do one of two things: check online or suggest that one be created at your child’s school or at the local recreation center. Chances are that a yoga class for children and teens were already in the works, as more and more parents and professionals are discovering the many benefits of yoga.
As a parent, it is also important that you learn about your child’s friends. Adolescents frown on their parents meddling in their business, but not only is it your business, but if you expect to put an end to your son’s or daughter’s negative behavior then finding out as much as you can about your child’s friends is imperative. You can learn a great deal about your child by meeting the people he or she considers to be their friends.
If your child is hanging around kids who you don’t feel are a good influence, then you shouldn’t hesitate to tell him or her so. Of course this won’t stop your child from hanging out with these kids while at school, but it is certainly possible to prevent your child from hanging out with kids you feel are a bad influence outside of school hours. Children and teens can be very easily led to perform in a manner in which they normally wouldn’t by hanging out with the wrong crowd. There is peer pressure to consider, and some kids have a difficult time refraining from giving in to the pressure for fear of being ostracized at school.
Since teens often have the tendency to behave manipulatively, you need to be sure that you know exactly where your teen is at all times. If he or she is going to be hanging out with a friend at their house, then be sure to meet the parents of the friend and verify that your child will be there.
Volunteer to drive your child to activities instead of allowing him or her to be picked up by others. That way, you will know where your child is spending time. Of course there is no way of knowing if your son or daughter will go someplace else after you leave, but you can only do what you can. Teens are sneaky and very resourceful, and if they want to do something that you wouldn’t approve of, they will find a creative way to do so. That is why it is important that you keep the lines of communication open with your teen. Encourage him or her to talk to you about anything and let him or her know that you will not “freak out” no matter what he or she tells you. You need to keep to your word, as well, even if your teen tells you something truly shocking. If you do lose your cool, then you will make it less likely that your teen will continue to come to you in their time of need.
It is also important to ensure that your teen has his or her cell phone fully charged prior to going out with friends. That way you can reach your child can call you in case of an emergency and you can contact him or her anytime necessary, as well.
As you can see, having a condescending child could lead to a great deal of problems. Not only does your child have a higher likelihood of becoming a bully if he or she continues to behave in this manner, but there is an increased chance that he or she could face a number of unpleasant consequences as a result. However, if you intervene before it’s too late, your child could leave their condescending ways behind and become a caring and fair-minded adult who treats everyone as equals. The transformation may not occur overnight, but with time and patience, you may eventually have the child that you desire.