Marie Krag is a MA Psychotherapist/Counsellor. You can reach her at www.mariekragtherapy.co.uk. She talks to NoBullying.com about what everyone should know about the many pictures of Bullying. There is no one side to bullying but rather several sides, images and pictures of Bullying.
NB: What would be your definition of A Bully?
A person that intimidates another to control , disrespect, or frighten them.
NB: Are parents, teachers and social workers dealing with bullied victims and/or bullies the right way?
In schools it would be mostly up to the head and the school’s policy. In a private school where my grandsons attended there were signs all over saying that there was zero tolerance of bullying. I understand with the girls it was more difficult as it was not so obvious, more like underhanded comments.
NB: Are children/people more aggressive on-line…
I doubt it. It is a new form of “communication”. We will have to learn to deal with it.
NB:What should a school or parent watch out for in a child’s behaviour that might be a warning sign of bullying?
Not wanting to go to school. Falling grades. Being more silent.
NB:What can schools do to ensure they provide the best education and advice to children on Bullying?
Have open discussions and surely there are some videos out that cover this.
NB:Have you knowledge of any severe cases and consequences of Bullying?
Not at school.
NB:Can a spouse/life partner bully their significant other?
That is what we therapists do. Sexual abuse from brother to sister, sexual abuse from brother to brother (the victim later committed suicide) and the unfortunate abuse that does go on from parent, step-parent to children.
NB:How do people bully others today?
In the same way they always have. Threats, spreading false rumours, physical violence.
NB: Is social media, mobile phones and easier online access making it easier for bullies?
Yes because it makes it more difficult for teachers and parents to monitor it. But with any new technology we need to find ways to deal with this.
NB:Any tips or advice on how a parent should approach Bullying with their children to ensure they understand how wrong it is?
The most important thing is to have a relationship with a child that they feel it is OK to approach the parent with a problem. I think an open discussion about bullying is to ensure the child that they won’t make it worse by going to the school to report it (though if the school really doesn’t have a decent policy, it could make it worse). One father I heard of found out his son was being bullied by older, bigger boys. He approached these boys and asked them if they would “protect” his son as he thought they were tough enough to do this. A real chance he took but he said it worked. My younger son was bullied on the school bus – evidently my friend’s older boy sorted it out quickly and completely. I never knew about it until years later. My other son’s cap was grabbed and threw away on the train coming back from school. I just went out and bought another cap. The next thing that happened was that we got a letter (he could hardly write) from the boy who evidently did it apologizing profusely . This I think was due to a headmaster that just wouldn’t tolerate bullying of any kind.
NB: If a child has been bullied – what is the best advice for them?
Tell the teacher, tell the parents. It may be appropriate to tell the police.
NB: Is there likely to be long term effects on children who are Bullied?
Of course. Lack of self- confidence, fear of those, mistrust of others.
NB: What would you advise a person who is being bullied in work?
That would depend on who – is it their boss? Is it a colleague? Companies usually have policies about this. I felt I was being bullied in my last job. I took it up and beyond the director of the unit I was with. I managed to hang onto the job but I don’t advise causing waves. It doesn’t help your career. I think in most cases it is better to find another job. I was going to leave this job eventually anyway because I was coming to the UK.
NB: Any current trends we should be aware of?
Continue to monitor what happens with the new communication technology.
Check out our interview on the bullying mentality and scroll down for more on Bullying Pictures
Cyber Bullying Pictures
Bullying can be a terrifying and traumatizing experience for both the victim and parents. According to the National Education Association, 71% of students report bullying as a problem at their school and 90% of 4th through 8th graders report being victims of bullying.
In 2011, the Youth risk Behavior Surveillance survey reported that 16% of high school students had experienced cyber bullying that year. Cyber bullying can take many forms, one of the most concerning bullying pictures. Bullying pictures are pictures that teens post of their peers to shame, humiliate, and harass them.
Social Media’s Role
With social media applications easily accessible on a cell phone like Instagram and Facebook, which allows the user to share pictures and videos, bullying pictures have become easier to share and normalized for the current teenage population.
Bullying Pictures’ Victims
In 2008, USA Today reporter Janet Kornblum covered the story of Ricky Alatorre, a 16-year-old high school student bullied with a fake MySpace (the predecessor of Facebook) profile with a picture of him taken by a peer in class as the main photo. The profile made fun of his success in school, his upbringing on an Indiana farm, and taunted him with false accusations about his sexuality.
For Ricky, who was teased by fellow classmates since starting school in kindergarten, this bullying in the form of pictures was absolutely devastating:
“When they put it on the Internet, it’s like they took everything and multiplied it by an astronomical number. It’s one thing if it’s a mean thing that somebody put in my school paper because that’s contained within a small area. Only a certain number of people will see that. But when you put it on the Internet, you are opening it up to everyone in the world.”
Sixteen-year-old reporter Temitayo Fagbenle reports on the disturbing and harmful trend of bullying pictures that she has witnessed : online “slut shaming”. This slut shaming involves the posting and sharing explicit videos and pictures of young women by their peers.
Sometimes the photo is taken with the young woman’s consent by herself or her boyfriend, but not intended to be shared. There are also instances of peers taking these explicit photos or videos without the victim’s permission or knowledge.
Fagbenle shares a friend’s experience with bullying pictures:
“Two years ago, when I was in ninth grade, a girl in my class faced a similar situation. Her boyfriend put an intimate video of them up on the Internet, and suddenly everyone was talking about it. ‘He was going around holding his head high,’ the girl [said]. ‘He gave me a bad name’.”
Suicide: The Terrible Result of Bullying Pictures
Bullying, specifically cyber bullying, is an incredibly serious safety concern for young people. It is an issue that can be deadly to its victims. Sometimes, without the proper attention and support, suicide seems like the only way out of humiliation, shame, and hurt.
The CDC reports suicide as the third leading cause of death among young people. Almost 7 percent of American high school students have attempted suicide, while over 14 percent have reported considering it.
According to studies by Yale University, bully victims are two to nine times more likely to consider committing suicide than non-victims.
Ricky Alatorre, the victim of bullying pictures on MySpace, considered suicide after discovering the profile:
“I had thought about suicide. It looked very welcoming at certain times.”
Thankfully, Ricky had the support and love of his family, such as his mother Peggy to help him get through this traumatic experience. But, as the statistics show, not every victim receives the support they need.
Faced with these terrible safety concerns, what steps can a potential victim or concerned parent take to help prevent cyber bullying through bullying pictures or to deal with its aftermath?
Steps a Potential Victim Can Take
- Don’t give out personal information online
- Stop and think carefully before taking and sending any sexually explicit photos, even if to a trusted friend or significant other
- Don’t participate in cyber bullying of any kind as it will be harmful to your peers as well as make you a potential target
- Report the bullying immediately to a trusted adult such as your parents or favorite teacher
- Save the evidence in order to have as much proof of the harassment as possible
- Don’t be afraid to reach out for help in the forms of a school guidance counselor or asking your parents to see a professional to take about your experience
- Being a victim of bullying is an incredibly difficult experience. Seeking help does NOT mean you are weak, instead it is a testament to your strength!
- Keep an open and honest dialogue ongoing with your children about cyber bullying and other online issues
- Remind your child of the damaging effects of cyber bullying to prevent their involvement
- Stay calm and do not blame your child, even if they made a poor decision such as sharing explicit photos with others
- Meet with school officials to discuss the next steps
- Watch carefully for warning signs of depression and suicidal thoughts
- Take all threats of suicide or self-harm seriously and seek professional help for your child
Bullying is ingrained in our society, especially in the lives of young people in middle school and high school, but it does not have to be this way. Stay informed about bullying trends such as bullying pictures to protect yourself, your children, or your community from the effects of bullying.